Where's the Water?

So I went hiking to "Waterfall Canyon" tonight. You're probably asking yourself "water, they have water in AZ?" Then you might ask yourself "why does she have it in quotes?" You, my blog readers, are so observant. The answer . . . you have to create the image in your mind or do what I did. Made my own waterfall.

Ah, Arizona

Here's a little poem I found about the beautiful state of AZ:

The devil wanted a plave on earth
Sort of a summer home
A place to spend his vacation
Wheneever he wanted to roam.

So he picked out Arizona
A place both wretched and rough
Where the climate was to his liking
And the cowboys hardened and tough.

He dried up the streams in the canyons
And ordered no rain to fall
He dried up the lakes in the valleys
Then baked and scorched it all.

Then over his barren country
He transplanted shrubs from hell.
The cactus, thistle, and prickly pear
The climate suited them well.

Now the home was smuch to his liking
But animal life, he had none,
So he created crawling creatures
That all manking would shun.

First he made the rattlesnake
With its forked poisonous tongue.
Taught it to strike and rattle
And how to swallow its young.

Then he made scorpions and lizards
And the ugly old horned toad.
He placed spiders of every description
Under rocks by the side of the road.

Then he ordered the sun to shine hotter,
Hotter and hotter still.
Until even the cactus wilted
And the old horned lizard took ill.

Then he gazed on his earthly kingdom
As any creator would
He chuckled a little up his sleeve
And admitted that it was good.

T'was summer now and Satan lay
By a prickly pear to rest.
The sweat rolled off his swarthy brow
So he took off his coat and vest.

"By Golly," he finally panted,
"I did my job too well,
I'm going back to where I came from,
Arizona is hotter than Hell."

You Call That Art?

Don't you really hate it when you see a small black rectangle next to a large red square that's on a large sheet of canvas, and it's called "Envy," and it's considered art. How hard is that to do? I could totally do that. I just choose not to.

My friend and I spent ~ 2hours at the Phoenix Art Museum (you're not missing anything) and first we went through the modern art exhibit. At one point we pretty much walked into a pitch black room w/ a fogger device and it apparently was called art. I was like "where's the real art?" Seriously. Or how about the revolving halogen lamp that relected light onto the walls of the round room? Or the video clip that was mostly black nothingness accompanied by music. I wonder if they accept living arts. What if I stood there on a small block wearing a jeans and a t-shirt that said "my art is better than your art," or "the real art's upstairs," or "my friend went to Phoenix and all I got was this stupid t-shirt they call art."

It's SO Hot in AZ that . . .

1. no oven is needed for baking potatoes--just grab one out of the ground and slap on some butter and sour cream
2. the cows produce evaporated milk
3. seat belts are the new branding irons
4. in July you only need 2 fingers to drive (thus explaining the # of MVAs)
5. asphalt has a liquid state even after it has been poured and set
6. you don't need a stove to make scrambled eggs--just find a sewer grate or a clean slab of cement
AND my personal favorite (I can't take credit for it)
7. you've experienced condensation on your butt from the hot water in the toilet bowl.

The Seven Summits of the Valley

I know I will never hike/climb the Seven Summits of the world (Kilimanjaro, Denali, Elbrus, Aconcagua, Carstensz Pyramid, Vinson, and Everest). But I just found out after some exploring on the internet that I can do this on a smaller scale in Phoenix. From the hardest to the easiest, the seven summits are:


1. Camelback Mountain
2. South Mountain
3. Piestawa Peak
4. Shaw Butte
5. North Mountain
6. Lookout Mountain
7. Shadow Mountain

I had already hiked 2 (Camelback & Piestawa Peak) before I knew about the Seven Summits of the Valley. This morning I completed 2 more (Lookout Mountain & Shaw Butte). Here's some pics.

Sorry for the Grammatical Errors

Apologies are in order for my spelling error (cervaza) and for some grammatical errors. I don't really care, but my mother does. Thanks Mom!

Does it matter how far away you park when you don't remember where you park?

Of course that's a rhetorical question. Let me tell you it doesn't matter if you park in Mexico or San Diego if you don't remember where you park. I speak from experience. A couple of days ago I spent like 10 minutes looking for my car when it was pretty much at my front door. Maybe I should paint my apartment # on my spot.

Thanks to Honda!

I'm sure you're all chomping at the bit to find out what happened w/ my car. Well, apparently the actuator problem is very rare especially in a '04 CRV according to 2 dealerships. I had it fixed at the dealership and it cost me close to $200. I went home and did some research and discovered that I could call Honda and file a concern. So I did that and guess what . . . they are refunding me the $$ for the repairs. I am so pleased that a company stands behind their product. This is why I bought a Honda!!

Mexico's Great!

So I've been here ~ 4 weeks and have been to Mexico 3 times already. That's pretty amazing huh? I've been to Mexico at 9pm, 11pm and 3am and the walk back sucks. You see here at this lovely gated apartment community I live in, they do not have assigned parking unless you rent a garage. I can park anywhere, but the ever popular covered spots are for residents only. And everyday I drive back to my building which is on the end and every single spot is taken. Especially after 8pm. I've had to walk from Mexico (which is approximately 200 yards from my building) in the heat, with pants and closed toed shoes on, carrying a bag w/ 1 drop of water left in my water bottle so many times that I'm actually fluent in Spanish. Uno serviso por favor!

It Does Get Cloudy Here and It Does Rain

I remember my first cloudy day here in AZ. I was excited to see the clouds (don't ask why, b/c I love the sun). But these weren't real clouds--that "cloud" was from the Brin's Fire near Sedona. So I was a bit disappointed b/c I thought I'd see real clouds. Not to worry, b/c the monsoon season is here and you can pretty much mark it to the day on your calendar every year--July 4th. Even though I saw a real cloud a couple of weeks after I arrived, the big ones came in after the fireworks show. And these actually produced maybe 3 drops of rain. It was quite refreshing. I kinda hogged 2 out of the 3 raindrops b/c I needed to cool off my sunburn. It's nice to see clouds every once in a while. I'd never thought I'd tire of the sun, but when you spend 3 hours on a river w/ little to no sun protection . . . Here's the proof.

Holy Hotness Batman

I don't ever remember being as hot as I have been since I've been alive! And I usually am always the cold one. And I always say I love the heat and hate the cold. Well, I'm thinking twice. Yesterday I went tubing on the Salt River for about 3 hours and reapplied sunscreen, but I'm a pepto bismol pink. Doesn't that always happen when you're out in the sun and you don't think you are getting pink, so you don't apply sunscreen, but 2 hours later you see that indeed you are burnt? After tubing, I was outside to watch fireworks, and since I had my own internal heating system, I was roasting. Before I left IL I remember people telling me "it's hot out there and you're going in the summer." And I'd say, "yeah, but it's a dry heat." And they'd say "yeah, but 120 is 120." It's true.

I Bought it Cause it Wasn't Supposed to Break

Any Honda owners out there? I am the proud owner of a Honda which I bought brand new in '04 based on the fact that they are excellently made cars, the engine never dies (well maybe at 200,000+miles), and that rarely are there problems w/ it. I also chose to purchase brand new b/c I didn't want any problems. Well, I've had several problems since owning it and the most recent is the locking mechanism on the driver's side door. I discovered this weekend that my remote would not lock the driver's door. I thought it might be the battery and I replaced it, but the problem still persisted. As I searched further, I found out that the remote would lock all other doors, but the driver's door. Also, when I tried to lock and unlock it from the inside w/ the button, it still would not work. The only way I could lock or unlock my driver's side door was to use the key. So 2 out of 3 mechanisms to lock/unlock the door are not working. Of course it's beyond the factor warranty and of course I did not buy the extended warranty b/c Honda's never break. I should have known that I would have problems when I had a flat tire 1 month after I bought the car (poor seal on the alloy wheel), and when the tiny light bulb on the cruise control burnt out (the service man kindly told me that in the 20+ years he worked w/ Honda's he never had to replace the bulb). It's my lucky day!

The Great Outdoors

After taking an ~3 hour "nap" I got up at 5:30 this morning to set out on an adventure to see the Great Outdoors of Arizona--Camelback Mountain. It's the closest mountain to my apartment and I thought it would be a great place to start. So I packed tons of water, sunscreen, clothes, etc, and put the bike on the back of my car and drove out there. Prior to hiking, I had checked out some stuff on the internet to gauge how challenging the trail would be. There are 2 short ones recommended for beginners and 2 more difficult ones for "experienced hikers." So who qualifies for an experienced hiker? Well certainly not the family of 5 children under the age of 12 who had only 1 20 oz bottle of water each (I kindly gave them some of my extra water) who were making their way up around 8:30 am (which is too late in this heat). How about the 75+ gentleman who was on his 3rd (out of 4) trip at 7:50am. Get this . . . he hikes every day except Sundays and starts at 4:30am. He told me that the path I took was the more dangerous of the 2. I love a challenge. I'm sorry I did not take a picture w/ him. So how was it? It was awesome!! It was worth it. You can see Pheonix in 360. You could see planes taking off from the airport. You also get cell phone service up there! Going up was easier than going down. Even though I kinda consider myself in shape, my quads were quivering on the way down.